Your past does not define your future.

photo (9)Your past does not define your future. I have often referred to that saying throughout my blogs because I believe it is an undeniable truth. We have seen many people overcome unrealistic, heart breaking circumstances and do great things with their lives. One who stands out in my mind is Dave Pelzer, who wrote the book, “A Child Called It, One Child’s Courage to Survive”. Another is Joyce Meyer, who was emotionally and sexually abused by her father for the first 18 years of her life. These people had unsurmountable odds stacked against them, but went on to serve and help others in the most productive ways possible.

I too, want to think of myself as one who has not let their past define their future. I have a past like everyone else.  Not proud of some of my past, but it is what it is. I did many things that I am ashamed of, but I refuse to let that be my future. I consider myself a born again Christian who has a passion for sharing God’s love and promises. I write this blog because I know that changing your mindset will absolutely change your future. I want to remind others that just because they have a past doesn’t mean you have to relive your mistakes every day.

You can begin a whole new chapter in your life by changing what you put into your mind today. Don’t let anyone tell you any different. If you have someone in your life that is dragging you down, then cut them loose. You don’t have to be mean about it, but when they start in, excuse yourself from the situation, go somewhere else, politely get off the phone, quit following them on Facebook, whatever it takes, but don’t let them tell you who you are.

I want to share with you the truth that you are beautifully and wonderfully made by our God. He has put you here to do great things. Let your past be a learning tool to move forward. Let it make you be a stronger person who wants to learn from their mistakes. You are a child of God and you deserve to be happy and fulfill your life’s passion. Learn to Invite Excellence into Your Life, for this is what God wants for you. Go be all God designed you to be and follow your passions.

Marital crisis!!

My husband and I recently went through a marital crisis. It was long coming due to the neglect of our marriage. We have been busy with raising our children, work, and hobbies. We never stopped to work on our marital relationship. After years of neglect it all came tumbling down. Although the collapse was extremely painful, we both decided that we wanted to give our marriage a second chance. I consider this a blessing. I now get an opportunity to focus on my marriage and make it the absolute best marriage possible. During this time we chose to seek wise counsel. We are seeing a counselor to help us with communication and working through issues that are hard to discuss on our own without arguing.

Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife. Proverbs 21:9

I also picked up several biblical based marriage books that are helpful. One thing that these books are doing for me, is exactly what I share on my blog, they are filling my mind with the correct thoughts toward my husband and marriage. They help me to stay focused on the positive side. They remind me to always show love and respect to my husband. When my thoughts start to stray on some old hurt, I am reminded of things that I have recently read about forgetting past hurts and to only focus on today. One of the books that I am reading is “Love Life for Every Married Couple”, by Dr. Ed Wheat and Gloria Okes Perkins. Our counselor recommended, “His Needs, Her Needs”, by Willard F. Harley Jr. Both of these books have wonderful information to fill your mind with. I reflect back often on information from these books to help me stay focused on the positive aspects of my marriage.

I realized during this time, that while I spent my quiet time with God that I read a devotional for me and I prayed over my children, but I never prayed over my marriage or husband. Now included in my quiet time, I use the book by Stormie Omartian, “The Power of a Praying Wife”. I get my mind focused on right thinking toward all of my family, not just part of them. My marriage, just like me, will continue to be a work in progress. I am thankful that I was given this chance to realize it before it was too late.

Do something kind and unexpected for your spouse this week just because. If you are not including your spouse and your marriage in your prayers then please start including them today. Make it a goal for next year to work on your marriage to make it the best possible and seek wise counsel if you’re not sure where to start.

Dare to be yourself.

I haven’t always been comfortable with who I was. I was certainly not comfortable in my own skin. I would see others and be envious of who they were or what they had. I wanted to keep up with the Jones’ so to say. I wanted to brag about things I had or did. It made me feel like somebody important when others envied me for a change.

Little did I know that being comfortable with myself had anything to do with things. It has to do with looking inside and figuring out why I think the way I do. I had to find what I was lacking as a person. I lived with a lot of insecurities for a long time. I believe it had to do with my childhood and being around kids that belittled others as sport. I always wanted to fit in and would follow the crowd to do so.

I have come a long way, but still struggle with these things at time. I like who I have become and have found that being the real you is much better than pretending to be someone else just to fit in. I love who God has created me to be. I found my true self when I allowed God to teach me to forgive myself and others. I am not perfect, nor will I ever be, but I will try everyday to be the best me that I can. I want to be honest with myself for the first time in my life. I don’t want to live in fear anymore and hide behind what I think others want me to be.

Are you being your true self? Are you living the life you want to live? Decide today to forgive yourself and others, love yourself and others, and be all that God created you to be. You owe yourself that.